September 24, 2012

That Kind of a Day

It's a don't-really-want-to-be-where-I-am kind of a day.

Where I'm wondering if there's more and we're missing it and I'm asking if we should be looking and pondering whether we've stopped.

It's the kind of day where discontent knocks on my door and begs to come in and settle down on my sofa to stay for a nice, long visit.  Where disillusionment feels like a warm, cozy blanket to snuggle with and hide under, rather than throw off and discard.

Sometimes it's easy to give way and believe the lie that the grass must be greener on the other side and then set out determined to find that lusher, greener, more beautiful grass.

I wonder... what does Jesus say to my questions?  Does he want me to answer the knock of discontent and snuggle under the blanket of disillusionment?  What does he think of me entertaining thoughts of ambitious quests for greener grass?

He says...  "Stay the course.  Hold fast.  Do not give way.  Keep the faith.  Embrace hope.  Feel desire deeply and stay in it, but do not be ruled by it.  Put your trust in me and be... who you are, where you are.  Be and keep being."

"Do not throw away your confidence, he said.  Do not budge from your perch, but sing your song, summer confident and sure of my great goodness toward you.  You did not bring this spring, dear child, you do not have to arrange for the summer to follow.  They come from thy Father's will and they will come."  ~from "The Journey of Desire" by John Eldredge

The tall, green grass and bright yellow wildflowers just a short walk from my home...


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